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It’s hard to place into words exactly what it’s that Esosa Odia does. Make-up art, digital art and inventive direction could all be used to explain their discipline, yet none of them quite capture the surrealness of scrolling through their Instagram. Odia’s world is monochromatic and defined, immersing you in ethereal punk make-up and digital manipulations of the body. These creepy yet beautiful and charming creations are how Esosa allows themselves to be vulnerable. Each piece of art they share portrays a struggle, whether it’s reconnecting with their passion for make-up, feeling overwhelmed by social media or insecure about who might enjoy their “weird edits”.

In Sugar Land, a suburb right outside of Houston, Texas, Odia grew up with a quietness they’d have described as uninteresting on the time, but have now come to understand. “The stillness allowed me to get to know myself,” they are saying. It’s this isolation that pushed them to seek out a house in web communities like Tumblr and create their very own digital space. “Belonging to a bunch of individuals and feeling completely seen and accepted was foreign to me,” they explain, “it continues to be something I desire to this present day.”

Having found a refuge in digital spaces as a youngster is why Odia continues to digitise and share their art today, despite the intensely personal nature of it; crafting make-up looks on their very own skin with tangible products after which editing all of it into something inhuman. Within the drastic deconstruction of their appearance, Odia opens up and is in a position to find connections to others through shared experiences. “The feeling I get is incredible. It appears like I’m finally doing something right, which is why I proceed to share,“ they are saying. “At my core, I desire connection.”

Seeking to the longer term, their profession is removed from mapped out – and that’s a superb thing. “I believe that I actually have had various small milestones which can be build up to something great. I’m just unsure what it’s yet,” Odia says. All they know is they’ll’t imagine a life without art. Without that connection they seek. “This sometimes makes me feel a bit of crazy, I’m pouring a lot of myself into something and I’m unsure where it’s going, however it also adds to the joy.”

Below we seek advice from Odia about their subversive, unearthly art, creative metamorphosis and their relationship with beauty.

What’s it you do and why do you do it?

Esosa Odia: I’m a digital artist. I create since it aids in my healing process. The undeniable fact that my art is a direct representation of my life experience makes it quite personal. Attributable to this, I used to be extremely apprehensive about sharing it online. I felt as if I used to be carelessly throwing my art to the wolves. I didn’t consider people would treat it with care the identical way I did.  

Despite the fact that I actually have had just a few bad experiences, luckily people have expressed great appreciation for my art, letting me know the several ways in which they relate to it, and once they do, the sensation I get is incredible. It appears like I’m finally doing something right, which is why I proceed to share. I feel this fashion because at my core I desire connection.  

How did you get into it?

Esosa Odia: My journey began with make-up, but I didn’t change into the artist I’m today until I started teaching myself methods to do photoshop. What pushed me in that direction was the need to inform a story. I knew that I enjoyed make-up, but I didn’t feel satisfied stopping at that. So I threw myself into the world of photoshop, and more recently I actually have been experimenting with 3D art and animation. I feel as if discovering these art forms opened some sort of portal right into a recent world of possibilities. I used to be able to ascertain something after which create it. I had never felt that sort of power before. 

What are you trying to speak through your work?

Esosa Odia: I take advantage of my art as a method to speak the extreme emotions I feel from everyday that I can’t express with words. Each piece is deeply personal. These lived experiences that took place over the span of months and even years are actually neatly condensed into files on my computer. There may be a wide selection of emotions behind each piece, and by releasing them into the world the goal is to evoke emotion within the those who are viewing them and bond over the emotions that arise, though they won’t be the exact same.

What’s your earliest beauty-related memory?

Esosa Odia: My earliest beauty-related memory is just not a nice one. I used to be around eight or nine. Before this incident I didn’t pay much attention to how people looked. But I began to understand that I used to be being treated in another way than a few of my peers. I looked different from lots of my classmates. I actually have all the time been tall, large-framed and dark-skinned. I noticed that the smaller, lighter, long-haired girls were treated much softer. They were handled with care, talked to in a softer tone, always being told how pretty they were. I desired to be treated like that as well. I used to be a sensitive kid, so I picked up on little things. It was like at some point I made the connection that I used to be being treated in another way due to how I look. So my first encounter with beauty was coming to the realisation that they were beautiful and I used to be not, or so I believed on the time. 

Which fictional character do you most relate to?

Esosa Odia: Clancy Gilroy from the show Midnight Gospel. I relate to him with regards to the need to explore recent things and seek advice from as many individuals as possible. I like speaking with individuals who I feel either know greater than me, or have a distinct perspective than me. I feel like by listening to them without judgement I’m in a position to form a more well rounded outlook on things, whether I agree with them or not.

Who’s your beauty icon? 

Esosa Odia: My beauty icon is my younger self. I grew up as an emo kid and I had strict parents that will not buy the materials I needed to freely express myself, so at times I’d should get crafty and think outside of the box to attain the looks I wanted. I believe back to those times once I am creating. Now that I actually have a method to get whatever I would like, I’m limitless. 

What’s your current obsession?

Esosa Odia: My current obsession is reading webtoons. At first once I began reading them online, I felt as if it was unproductive since it was taking time away from other things, but then I realised that relaxing and finding enjoyment in things that aren’t work is an element of a healthy balance, and it also contributes to my creative process.

When do you are feeling most beautiful?

Esosa Odia: I feel probably the most beautiful once I am being kind to myself. As I show up for myself time and time again I’m reminded of how resilient and caring I’m. I actually have developed a deep trust in myself, which has made me feel beautiful inside, and because it strengthens it has radiated outward.  

What’s the longer term of beauty?

Esosa Odia: The long run of beauty is diverse, expansive and experimental. People will start to come back to the realisation that beauty doesn’t look a certain way. It exists in all places, inside everyone. 

When you could have a recent sense on top of your existing ones, what would it not be?

Esosa Odia: I’d select telepathy. I believe this stems from my desire to be seen and understood on a deep level. 

You encounter a hostile alien race and sound is their only mechanism for communication. What song would you play to them to encourage them to spare you and the remainder of the human race? 

Esosa Odia: I’d play the song “Agape” by Nicholas Britell. To me, that song feels like what falling in love appears like, so I hope it could make them less hostile they usually might consider letting me live.