“Do you would like me to do your make-up? I can do your make-up if it’s going to make you are feeling somewhat more feminine,” asks Julieta ASMR, in certainly one of her TikTok roleplays where she does the viewer’s make-up to assist them feel femme. This particular clip has over 55,000 likes, with quite a few comments from grateful viewers. “As a trans girl I really like this,” one reads. “I’m non-binary and this made me so completely happy,” says one other. “So many sweet heartfelt comments like these make me completely happy,” Julieta, an inclusive ASMRtist, tells Dazed.

There are quite a few gender-affirming ASMR videos similar to this scattered across TikTok and YouTube. There’s Gibi ASMR’s ‘getting you ready for Pride’ series, where she refers back to the viewer using a wide range of pronouns in order that they can see what ‘clicks’ for them. There are audio-only videos where the ASMRtist pretends to be the viewer’s boyfriend or girlfriend and whispers positive affirmations to assuage their dysphoric feelings. There’s also a complete range of ‘personal attention’ and roleplay videos on the market, where ‘your gatekeeping bestie does your make-up’ or ‘the girl behind class plays along with your hair’. Lots of these aren’t specifically designed for trans viewers, but they will still be hugely useful – especially after they simulate conventionally ‘feminine’ or ‘masculine’ scenarios or settings that viewers might feel excluded from or interested by, equivalent to your bestie ‘getting you ready for prom’ or a healthful gym bro ‘providing you with a pep talk’.

The term ASMR (which stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response) was first coined back in 2010. It refers back to the tingling sensation that individuals feel on their scalp and spine while listening to certain sounds generally known as ‘triggers’, equivalent to tapping, scratching, or whispering. It’s relaxing – and for trans viewers, in addition they have the ability to be hugely affirming, act as an aid for anyone who’s questioning their gender identity, or help heal a wounded inner child.

It’s unsurprising that trans persons are turning to ASMR for therapeutic reasons: in recent times, there’s been an increased give attention to the potential health advantages of ASMR. A 2018 study found that ASMR can stimulate the discharge of oxytocin, AKA the ‘love’ hormone; more recently, a study at Northumbria University found that ASMR has the ability to cut back stress and anxiety symptoms.

Julieta says that while she is cis, she will empathise with the trans community. “I got here out of the closet as a lesbian once I was 36 years old, so I do know what it’s wish to live in a way that makes other people uncomfortable,” she says. For Julieta, it’s essential to supply ASMR which ensures the trans community has “a secure space where they feel welcomed, included and celebrated”, given the amount of “harassment and hatred” the community has experienced in recent times.

Cléo, 29, tells Dazed that growing up, they received “little affection” and felt consistently “isolated” and “othered”, especially with regard to their gender identity. “The boys didn’t see me as a boy, the women didn’t see me as a woman […] I didn’t know where I should slot in until my mid-twenties,” they are saying, adding that they “truly imagine ASMR helped” them to know their identity as a non-binary person. 23-year-old Jewels can also be a fan of ASMR, particularly ‘positive reinforcement’ videos. Heather Feather is certainly one of her favourite channels. “Her videos made me feel like I actually do belong here as I’m, as I would like to be, on this journey where I won’t stop changing and growing for some time,” she says.

For Jewels, watching certain ASMR videos can trigger a way of gender euphoria – she says she “absolutely adored” Gibi’s Pride series. “ASMR absolutely helps affirm my gender. Sometimes I just must hear that I’m a woman.” For Jewels, hearing herself referred to using ‘she/her’ pronouns may also help her get a way of “direction” each time she feels lost or dysphoric. “Once I hear something I discover with, it clicks immediately,” she continues.

Talking to Dazed, Gibi says she was attempting to make content which made viewers feel “completely happy and cozy” about their gender while filming the Pride series. “I love seeing that my videos have resonated in a roundabout way,” she says. “It’s essential to me to have the trans community in mind once I’m filming any immersive content – so it makes me completely happy when it reaches that audience.” As she has a fluid relationship together with her own gender and uses pronouns interchangeably, she adds that she has found creating ASMR helpful when it comes to exploring her own identity too. “Making videos wherein I presented as masculine or intentionally creating non-binary characters has helped affirm how I feel,” she says.

Jewels also says that she enjoys ‘feminine’ roleplays – like Julieta’s popular ‘femme make-up’ video – or videos where the ASMRtist pretends to be an enormous sister helping you select your outfit. “It seems like I’m experiencing something I all the time desired to experience, and I get up pondering more about what I wear and the way I would like to be seen. It helps me be the person I would like to be.”  

Cléo has felt similarly while watching roleplay videos, especially ‘makeover’ ASMR clips. “It was like having that ‘make-up friend’ I never got to have as a teen,” they are saying. “I had enough of a facsimile to assemble my thoughts on how those things would make me feel – and it felt good. It felt like I could lay claim to a facet of femininity, that rite of passage, that was withheld from me.”

They explain that of their view gender is “a relentless internal dialogue, a series of questions you pose to yourself day after day”. With this in mind, it makes perfect sense that ASMR is a super, secure outlet for people to explore evolving feelings about gender identity. “In case you watch a make-up POV video and also you’re in a position to say ‘hey, this was weird for me and I don’t prefer it’ to yourself, then make-up probably is just not a gender-affirming thing for you,” Cléo explains.

“But when you may have questions, you’re on this immersive, virtual setting, where a form and patient person is doing all of your make-up – which many see as a formative and mandatory feminine right of passage,” they proceed. “In case you determine that this can be a thing that moved you… it’s only happened for you. It’s only inside your head. The key is secure with you.”

Trans and gender non-conforming people may also keep returning to ASMR videos time and again, if needed – something which is each private and free. “You don’t should buy a bunch of make-up, shave off all of your body hair, have someone try your recent pronouns – and have them promise not to say it again if it doesn’t give you the results you want,” Cléo says. By watching ASMR, they are saying, “you may proceed to ask these questions and have this dialogue on your individual until you’re able to escalate.”

All too often, the world is usually a difficult place to be trans – which makes it much more essential that inclusive ASMR communities exist. Sure, as Cléo says, it’s no substitute for real-life social connection. “Those creators should not my friends, they don’t know me, and I’m under no parasocial delusions,” they are saying. “But that doesn’t stop the actual fact it’s emotionally resonant. Everyone’s cried at a movie, right? You’ll be able to benefit from the fiction – then if it’s good to afterward, you may extract your facts.”

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