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3 Oct

Boris Kodjoe And Nicole Ari Parker On ‘Repeatedly Evolving’

Pascal Le Segretain/amfAR/Getty Images for amfAR

Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe could also be big Hollywood stars, but their busy schedules don’t keep the pair from prioritizing quality time — with their kids, Sophie, 17, and Nicholas, 15, and with each other. The 2 are sometimes lucky enough to even work together, including on their recent Lifetime movie Protected Space, which Nicole starred in and Boris directed.

Their latest collaboration is off-camera and involves something not as sexy and dramatic as Hollywood storylines, but essential nonetheless — cleansing. The couple has partnered with P&G in support of the brand’s Bounty paper towels and Microban 24 cleansing products. ESSENCE talked to them about that, in addition to how they bond as a pair after nearly twenty years and two children together. 

ESSENCE: What’s your cleansing routine and the way do your kids participate now that they’re older? 

Nicole Ari Parker: Boris got here to the wedding very organized and really clean and I got here in very messy, but not dirty. I even have plenty of stuff and Sophie got that trait. So now there are 4 adults in the home – almost. Nicholas is 15 but he’s 6’5″ and wears a 14 shoe. And Sophie is a full-on self-contained human adult who goes to school.

There’s plenty of cleansing that we’ve got to do and we’ve got to work together as a team. And so our cleansing game has really kicked up a notch within the last, I’d say five years. It’s really in regards to the surfaces where those bacteria live. We’re not fanatical in regards to the whole house. And so Bounty called with Microban 24 at the peak of [us] attempting to keep everyone secure, put down that extra layer of protection, and work out a straightforward routine that the children generally is a a part of. So, you only take the Bounty, you spray the Microban 24 in your surfaces, and also you wipe it clean and then you definitely spray it again and walk away. 

With our son being an athlete, there are plenty of gym bags and shoes and water bottles on the door and sunglasses and Sophie’s things and my things. And so our front door and our common areas are really my focus, then we just pass that right down to the children, in order that they’re used to those routines as well. But since they were little, we were all the time the “make your bed,” “clear the table,” “hang up your coat,” form of family.

What would you say cleansing or a clean home does in your mental health and well-being?

Boris Kodjoe: I believe that’s a very good query. And now that you simply say that, I believe it’s very essential because I believe clutter creates anxiety, at the very least for me. When there’s an excessive amount of clutter, I get a bit of bit uncomfortable. So having a routine as we do have with Microban 24 and Bounty helps me personally keep mindfulness across the house. And that’s essential when you will have a busy life as we do.

What’s a practice that you will have to aid you be present and live within the moment? 

Boris: I wish to go downstairs to the gym. I meditate, I do my breath work and I work out and I do this away from the phone. We’ve been so programmed to be addicted and depending on devices that it’s scary if you take a look at your phone at the top of the day and also you check-in. There’s a thing where you’ll be able to check how much time you spend on the phone, and it’s like nine hours. So, to get away from the phone, to spend a while with yourself in your personal space, for me, it’s super essential. And we try to try this as a family as well.

Are you able to share one family tradition that you simply guys wish to embrace in your household?

Boris: Definitely dinner. Every night we’ve got dinner together—-no phones, no nothing. It’s just us cooking after which we’ll have dinner together. And we speak about the whole lot. Within the last three years with the assorted pandemics, it was essential for us to attach and have that space and that point.

Nicole: Also, everyone’s processing what’s happening in a different way and I’d wish to ensure that my kids had an outlet and a strategy to process what’s occurring from their viewpoint.

As a pair, what would you say is one thing that you simply guys wish to do together to maintain you connected? 

Nicole: We do numerous traveling. I believe that’s been our love language. We travel so well together. And he’s from Germany and Ghana, so when the children got here, we were a traveling family. We’d go to see their grandma and their grandfather. It was really a part of our lives. 

I believe also, we’re attempting to slowly–you may be the primary to know this–do what all of them say about that morning breath work together. We haven’t perfected it. It sometimes ends with laughing. It doesn’t should be long, but we’re slowly attempting to breathe together.

Boris: My sister-in-law is a breath coach, Nicole Kodjoe. You’ll be able to check her out on Instagram. She’s an incredible breath coach who’s taught us rather a lot about respiration and the healing properties of that.

Your kids are rather a lot older now. What do you want most about this stage?

Boris: Simply to see them grow and explore the world on their very own. It’s only a implausible experience to have the option to witness that and all of the things that we attempt to teach them and taught them to type of manifest of their characters.

Nicole: I believe for me, keeping it real now, it has really allowed me as a parent to exhale. You already know, age appropriateness determines what you’ll be able to say and teach them and never scare them in regards to the world or give them an excessive amount of information in a phase that they’re not in yet, but now they’re saturated with a lot information that I feel like I can use my whole being as their mother. Like, ‘That is the way in which that is,’ or ‘That is what you do in this case.’ Or ‘Let’s speak about where you’re coming from and what you’re experiencing.’ I feel like I even have two really great smart people in my house that I can actually parent and be there for them.

After almost twenty years, what would you say your strength as a pair is? What makes you a dynamic duo?

Boris: I believe that we’re repeatedly evolving and attending to know one another even higher. It’s trial by error. It’s putting effort in each day, it’s work, but I discovered my person. So there’s nothing that I wouldn’t do to share my life together with her. So yeah, I believe that that may be it. To proceed to get to know one another higher, more intimately, and deeper. And more joyfully as well.

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