Life should be tough while you’re stunningly beautiful. No less than that’s what beautiful people keep saying. Tales of female jealousy are as old as time. When Greek goddess Aphrodite heard of a princess who was more beautiful than her, she flew right into a jealous rage and sent her son to poison the princess. In fairy tales, jealous queens and step-mothers punish young women for his or her beauty. These stories all hinge on female jealousy.

In real life though, do women actually hate attractive women? You might argue that today physical beauty is more vital than ever. While appearance has at all times been a type of social currency, the rewards it will possibly reap online have never been more obvious. A 2018 study showed that social media users who’re considered physically attractive have higher perceived likeability. Within the age of Instagram, beauty as social currency may be converted into actual currency because it helps gain large followings and influencer deals. Nonetheless, the identical study showed that users who post a high percentage of selfies have lower perceived likeability. This means that beauty is likeable only when it’s paired with modesty.

TikTok’s latest ‘why girls hate me’ trend is anything but modest. There’s nothing improper with pondering you’re beautiful and celebrating the actual fact, however the trend has been described as “so toxic” for pitting women against one another. Despite this, the ‘why girls hate me’ hashtag has amassed 1.8m views and counting. While among the videos are humorous and self-aware, many include conventionally beautiful teenagers and young women saying that other girls hate them because they’re pretty. Within the videos, creators, who are frequently slim, white and wearing natural make-up, hold their hand out as if introducing themselves to you with a handshake before the words, “Hi, I’m pretty” appear on the screen. A number of the comments prove the purpose made within the videos: “I’m sorry she makes me so mad I don’t know why.” Others suggest that girls don’t hate them because they’re pretty but due to their personality. Overall, nonetheless, a big majority of the comments are supportive, agreeing with the creator that they’re pretty and praising them for his or her self-confidence. 

Several users have identified why the trend is problematic though. Lauren Russell made a video under the hashtag saying, “other women don’t hate me and I don’t hate other women. That is internalised misogyny and pitting women against one another.” Russell has experienced being at the tip of somebody’s jealousy herself and she or he doesn’t need to invalidate anyone’s experiences. “Naturally, humans are likely to want what we don’t have,” she says, “so in fact there are many scenarios where jealousy could turn into an issue in your female friendships. It’s totally normal to feel jealous. What’s not okay is letting those emotions cause you to lash out against other women or anyone for that matter. I don’t support the trend that it’s cool for people to hate you.”

Paige Manzello originally took part within the trend with a video that received hundreds of thousands of views before she took it down. “My intentions with that video weren’t to bring anyone down, to not be seen as narcissistic, conceited, or a misogynist,” she says. “Humans are beautiful and the last item I ever need to do is bring other people down. I seriously don’t think other girls hate me because I’m pretty and for people saying that it’s due to my personality, you don’t know me well enough to evaluate me off my personality.”

While we are able to’t make sweeping judgements about individual human behaviour – who amongst us hasn’t ever felt jealous of another person? – evidence points towards ‘pretty privilege’, or ‘the halo effect’, being a rather more persuasive force in our perceptions of others than jealousy. The halo effect is typically known as the ‘what is gorgeous can also be good’ principle. It signifies that we usually tend to find beautiful people likeable and trustworthy.

“We discover by and enormous in just about all situations that being more attractive is a positive for people,” says Dr Lisa Walker, a sociologist specialising in group dynamics and social perceptions of attractiveness on the University of North Carolina. “In a workplace setting, attractive individuals are often given more influence. They’re more more likely to get hired. They often receives a commission more.”

There comes a degree, nonetheless, where being beautiful stops being received well by those around you. “In case you are extraordinarily attractive and a vision of perfection then that may backfire somewhat bit but only really in two ways,” Dr Walker continues. “In case you’re in a leadership position, for a lady to be particularly attractive may be detrimental because others don’t take her as seriously. That is not true for men. The opposite way is that there could be a little bit of resentment or jealousy or dislike. More often than not women don’t dislike other women who’re attractive, but there are probably a couple of occasions where someone is just so stunningly beautiful that you just react in a way.”

In 2012, an article titled ‘Why do women hate me for being beautiful?’ went viral. Journalist Samantha Brick argued that jealous friends have cut her off and feminine bosses have barred her from promotions at work all because she is attractive. The following hate that was directed towards Brick appeared to prove her point in a way, but backlash was mostly along the lines of, “No, actually. Women don’t hate you since you’re pretty. They hate you due to your personality.” The article launched a world debate. Many concluded that being beautiful is positive but being conceited or superior about beauty granting you an elite status is just not. In case you really consider that everyone seems to be jealous of you then you definitely will assume that the best way people treat you is all right down to that jealousy. There’s a difference between pondering you’re beautiful and assuming that your beauty negatively impacts your entire relationships. 

“There’s nothing improper with believing that you just’re pretty. Nonetheless, when people come forward on a TikTok trend or with an article telling the world how beautiful they’re, they are sometimes just reinforcing a narrow, Eurocentric definition of beauty”

There’s nothing improper with believing that you just’re pretty. If anything, more people should consider in their very own attractiveness. Nonetheless, when people come forward on a TikTok trend or with an article telling the world how beautiful they’re, they are sometimes just reinforcing a narrow, Eurocentric definition of beauty. What people find attractive is just not without its biases. The proven fact that beauty most of the time does open doors for people shows the importance of widening our definition of beauty and making it more inclusive for people of all races and genders.

It’s rare for ladies to dislike other women for his or her beauty, but once they do it’s unlikely to be due to beauty itself but due to things that beauty has helped them attain. “It’s not necessarily about wanting to look that way,” Dr Walker says, “but wanting to get all the great things that come from looking that good. Like, your life looks really easy because everybody’s nice to you and you possibly can have any man you wish and also you’ll get any job you apply for. It’s jealousy of the results of being that attractive.”

The implication that girls hate attractive women is reductive and sexist. It portrays women as shallow, petty caricatures competing for beauty and male attention reasonably than for achievements. It pits women against one another and ignores the rather more dangerous consequences that may come when men are jealous of female beauty. Male incels are rather more more likely to fly right into a jealous rage if the lady they desire rejects them than women are to chop off female friends simply because they’re attractive. It’s offensive to other women to assume that they won’t like you only because you might be pretty. 

Most of the time women actively hype one another up. Go to any woman’s Instagram comments and you will notice all of her friends bigging her up. Nightclub toilets are at all times filled with women waiting to inform other women how beautiful they’re. So, do girls hate girls because they’re pretty? Rarely, and it’s time to maneuver past reductive social media trends that implement that stereotype.